Certain inventions have changed the course of history by providing an efficient and convenient alternative method of handling the simplest as well as the most complex tasks. Think about electricity, combustion, antibiotics, transistors, so on and so forth. However, other “inventions” are only able to slightly alter the course of short term history, by making us laugh briefly or pondering about the mental balance of the people who patented them.
Of course, you would still have to question what exactly the clerks at the patent office had in mind when they awarded these inventions a legit status. Let’s review the top 10 innovations that won’t exactly change the world.
1. The flatulence containment pad
In all honesty, the revolutionary flatulence pad could represent a solution of passing gas wherever and whenever without being catalogued as short-range biological weapon. This pad is inserted in the buttocks part of the pants and its role is to prevent the odor from escaping, but you will never really be comfortable with the idea that you are essentially wearing an adult diaper. At the same time, according to a customer testimonial, this thing also acts as a pretty decent muffling system. Unfortunately, the only potential achievement it is capable of is the permanent elimination of flatulence-based comic relief.
2. The bumper sensor that dissociates between pedestrian and inanimate object collision
This sensor is at least ten times less useful than the flatulence pad and why its creators actually thought it would ever come in handy is still uncertain. In essence, its purpose is to take into account several factors of the collision in order to determine whether you just hit a person, a bump in the road or a small animal. It does nothing for accident prevention whatsoever because the data it analyzes is exclusively recorded post-collision.
3. Ear cylinders for dogs and other large-eared pets
If you own a basset hound, then your biggest worry is that its ears are constantly getting into the food bowl, right? Unfortunately no, not really and if the developers of these cylinders would have actually taken a few moments to research the potential market for their invention, then the ear protection devices might have never came to be. As mentioned, their gadget is a tube – similar to the toilet paper roll one that you can always use if the dried food on your pet’s ears triggers your OCD – in which you stick the dog’s ears to prevent them from stains.
4. Surfboards equipped with jet motors
The “Back To The Future” trilogy inspired invention sounds pretty cool, right? Who wouldn’t want to trip the waves with the added power of the jet engine to boost their speed? Unfortunately, while these jet powered surf boards could constitute an effective way to escape a shark attack, you wouldn’t really be able to exercise a lot of control over them, at least not until they invent electrodes that transmit the commands from your brain to the board wirelessly.
5. The glasses support system without temples
When you first look at the blueprints for this gadget, you get the idea that in order to support the frontal side of the frame you would have to surgically replace the ears with a couple of cylindrical magnets. The sacrifice would indeed be a step too far, so the developer thought of another “brilliant” way to get around the procedure, namely attaching the two aforementioned magnets with adhesives. Now, compared to the discomfort – not to mention the slightly ridiculous appearance – of putting up with the temples of the frame, then wearing the standard pair of glasses is a walk in the park.